Sunday, May 29, 2011

How My Wife And I Met

I've told this story to many friends and people over time, but I think it's time I put it down for everyone to read because it's so cool!

It was 1992.  I had been through many girlfriends, all failures, and I had decided I was going to be single for the rest of my life.  It was actually quite empowering.  I was finally relaxed, enjoying myself, not worrying about what women thought about me anywhere I went.  I decided if THEY were in ME then THEY would come talk to me, I wasn't going to approach them.  I finally was enjoying myself, not caring what anyone thought.  I was actually quite happy and calm.

Christmas came around and I exchanged gifts with my friends.  I opened mine which was from all of them.  It contained a newspaper and a fifth of whiskey.


Them: "Look at the newspaper."  Me: "This is the personals."  Them: "Look at the one we circled."  Me: "This is a guy."  Them: "Keep reading."  Me: "This is ME!!!!"  They said it was November, they were out wine tasting and after several winery's they decided they needed to find me a woman.  Not just any old woman, but a wife.  There were already three voicemails left and the fifth was for me to get up the nerve to call them back.  LOL!

So I listened to the voicemails.  Two I called back, left messages.  The third sounded like she called EVERY guy in the ads!  "Hi.  My name is xxx.  Your ad looked awesome.  Call me back."  I didn't call her.  No one every called me back.

In the mean time, my soon to be wife had actually sent a LETTER with a photo!  One problem.  My friends used their PO Box as the address.  They only check it ONCE a week, and had checked it the day BEFORE her letter arrived!  D'OH!  She thought I wasn't interested.  When my friends finally checked their PO Box, they opened the letter and called me saying, "You HAVE to check this one out!!"

I went to their house, read her awesome letter and saw her photo.  WOW!!!!  She was HOT!!!  I told my friends, "There's no WAY she'll be interested in me!"  They got on my case to call, so I went back to my place and called.

It was New Years Eve.  I called.  "Hi, is Marci there?"  "NO!!!"  "Um, ok.  Can I leave a message?"  "Yeah, I guess!!!....."  (Think extremely pissed off and not happy with me AT ALL!)

I was like, "Oh great, this is going over wonderful.  Oh well, I'll give her my info anyhow only because my friends would kick my butt if I don't."   "My name is Rich and she answered my ad in the Willamette Week..."  "OH WAIT!!!  Let me get a pencil!!!!!"  Her tone suddenly changed from "You're a freaking jerk and I want you dead to OH, you're THAT guy!!  You're ok!!!" 

I gave her my number and hung up figuring I wouldn't hear anything.  A little bit later she called.  She was at her parents house.  We talked for THREE HOURS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  We hit it off amazingly well, everything in common!  I was thrilled!!!  Her mom finally said, "Um, I don't really expect anyone to call, but someone might.  So can you HANG UP ALREADY?!"  We said we'd talk again soon.  I couldn't believe how awesome that call went and how great she was! 

The next day came and I wanted to call her back asap.  But I had a tendency to jump in with both feet and ruin things.  So I decided to wait a day.  Later that day she called me!!  Another three hours on the phone!!!!

We decided to meet for lunch, I told her, "I've seen you and you're amazing, but you haven't seen me.  If you are totally repulsed and can't wait to get rid of me, lunch is only an hour."  Ya, I had a lot of confidence in myself, huh?  ;) 

Lunch almost didn't happen.  I was working downtown, she was in NW Portland.  We decided to meet by the Fred Meyer in NW Portland.  It was a great idea, except she went to one corner and I went to the other.  Completely opposite corners!!!  We kept walking around trying to find each other, but missing each other for about 20 minutes.  I finally decided she wised up and didn't want to see me so I waited for a bus back downtown.  Staying in one place long enough paid off, she finally found me!

We had an AWESOME lunch.  One hour turned into TWO!!  After lunch, she drove me back downtown to my job.  She parked in a loading zone and we were saying bye.  Over, and over, and over.  We ended up kissing only to be interrupted by a mounted police rapping on her window saying, "You can't park here."  D'OH!  That was funny!

She was over at my place for the next two nights.  Things were going amazingly well, it was just right.  I told her, "You get off work before me and are always at my place before me.  Instead of you sitting in your car waiting for me, here's a key to my place."  Now women think one thing about this, but I'm a nerdy/geeky guy and I was just thinking it was stupid for her to sit in her car when she could go into my place and relax.  HONEST!!!

Two weeks later she decided she needed to get her own apartment (she was living with her sister).  She invited me to have dinner with her parents, which was cool, though I wasn't quite ready to meet them.  At dinner I said, "You know, you're over at my place all the time.  Instead of you paying $500-$700 for an apartment you'll never be in, why not just move in with me?  AND if you want, you can pay half the rent, which would actually help me because I over extended myself at Christmas."  Again, a nerdy/geeky guy being logical, not smooth or anything like that.  So she moved in.

You know how they say when it's right you just know it?  Well, that's what happened, very quickly.  I just knew she was THE ONE.  There was no effort, no trying, nothing.  It just WAS.  I have a hard time explaining it, but people who've felt this can understand and relate.  All the other times I thought I KNEW I had the right one and worked hard to make it right, yet they were all so very wrong.  This time there was no effort, no trying, nothing, it just WAS RIGHT!!!

Six months after we met I proposed.  Oh, and at four months I KNEW she was THE ONE, but decided to have some fun, so started playing down the talk of marriage.  By the time I proposed she thought I was no longer interested. ;)  I had wanted to propose, but I'm different, a little off center.  I can't just be at a restaurant or a park and get down on one knee, open the ring box and ask her to marry me.  It had to be different.  The billboard had been done.  TV was blah.  I couldn't come up with any ideas.  Then it hit me.

I was in a band at that time (a fun thing, I still had a day job).  She had been to many performances with us and was VERY tired of being pulled up on stage.  She said, "I'm done, do NOT EVER get me up on stage again!"  That's when I knew how to propose.  I told the director to pull her up on stage no matter what, that I was going to propose.  No one else knew.  He pulled her up for one of our songs, she protested a lot but finally came up.

After the song was over I quickly grabbed a mic and her, not letting her leave the stage.  I said, "Hey Bill!  I kinda like this one!  She's cute, I like the way she moves, the way her butt wiggles, you know they say good things come in small packages!"  (I'm 6'3" she's 5'3".)  "Can I keep her?"  He turned to the band and said, "I don't know.  What do you think band?"  The band was a little confused because they knew we were dating and the audience thought it was just part of the show.  They said, "Sure!"  I replied - and had rehearsed this in my head a FREAKING LOT - "Really?  Well in that case..."  But it came out very clearly on the video tape, "Really?  Well shit, in that case..."  D'OH!  I turned back to her, got down on one knee, pulled the ring out of my pocked, opened it and said, "Will you marry me?"

She kinda freaked and said, "yes" but it wasn't very loud and me being the showman said into the mic, "I'm sorry, they didn't hear you" then pointed it back to her and she said very loudly, "YES!!!!!!!"  It was so awesome!!!

A year later we were married and have recently celebrated 17 years together!  It's been a great time and every day I'm amazed someone as awesome as her is still interested in me!

So that's how we met and got together.  It's a fun story that I love to tell, but decided I'd share it with the world.  Hope you enjoyed it!  :)

p.s. I just re-read this to make sure I typed it all correctly and got all choked up remembering everything!  Man I'm silly! ;)